It was of much deliberation that I decided that I would still write this post.

Just to get a closure and to bid goodbye. 

After an arduous struggle and eventual realisation, I finally mustered enough courage to leave the one I used to love so much.

It was tough, difficult and of much reluctance. I had wanted to wait till at least we reached our 2nd year anniversary but I knew it was pointless to drag on after our last date.

On our last date, I finally saw through my own feelings and thoughts and faced that I indeed no longer feel the same way as before. It saddened me to discover those feelings, because I did once gave my all and everything to this one person.

I wondered before (and I still do) if it was too heartless and cold of me to suddenly walk away from this relationship. 

Getting out of it was a huge relief but I admit there were many details where I could have done better when I broached of the break up. 

It was a sudden event for him but to me, I saw myself fading out of the relationship gradually.

Towards the last few months of the relationship, I was extremely worn and tired and I no longer want to put in any more effort to make things work. 

I only tried to drag on to make myself better, to at least comfort myself that I've tried to give another shot at us.

But I knew I couldn't lie to myself nor to him anymore that I was still happy being in this relationship.

I couldn't put up a strong front anymore and pretend that things were okay, that all the negativity arising in my heart could be left unheard and untaken care of, that I'll still have the strength to see this relationship as a complete and blissful one.

I realised that parting ways then would be the best solution, so that we wouldn't have to hurt each other anymore.

No break up's gonna be easy, and the one who chooses to leave will always be deemed as the cold one, but I knew that we no longer have a future together, and holding on would only bring more pain.

All I want to say now is, sorry for bringing it across so suddenly and before all the festive events.

But I believe you would do better and I hope that everything works out for you.

The memories we've had together, I'd probably never forget.

You were my first boyfriend and this chapter of my life has taught me a lot and it's also thanks to this relationship, I got to know who my true friends are.

I was definitely happy when we finally got together and back then, I felt blissful to have been able to live in that bubble of happiness with you.

I was simply touched by any and every single little thing you did.

Thank you for once trying to make me the happiest woman alive, thank you for once trying to pamper me like a princess and for going out of your way to plant a smile on my face.

Thank you for remembering my favourites, for reassuring me tirelessly, for putting up with my bad temper.

It has been a great 2 years, thank you for sharing it with me.

It's finally time to say goodbye.

I hope that wherever you go and whatever you do, you will thrive and impress others with what you have. 

And I hope the next girl in your life will treat you better and that she will show you the meaning of "true love", which I hadn't got to. 

All the best.